As the oldest of seven grandchildren on my mother’s side, I have always enjoyed the colorful personalities of my cousins. However, a few months ago, the ways in which I viewed and valued one of my youngest cousins, Courtney, changed.
Courtney is my second youngest cousin and I have almost always thought of her as a little girl, until this past April when she came out as lesbian.
As soon as she came out, my thoughts toward Courtney flipped; from her being a little girl with long blonde pigtails to a courageous, strong young woman, living her life for no one but herself.
Just three months before her 18th birthday, Courtney’s declaration did shock some in the family. I would be lying if I didn’t say that the reactions were mixed. But because her confidence and joy were undeniable, unsure emotions were wiped away with the realization that she was truly happy.
Today is National Coming Out Day. According to the Human Rights Campaign, more than half of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transsexual youth say they are out to their immediate family; one quarter are out to their extended family.
When Courtney came out, I felt blessed that she shared this intimate portion of her life, with not only her family, but with her network of friends as well. After talking with her about it, she had grown tired of hiding who she is and she was ready to be open about it.
It was an incredibly brave stance for a girl not even graduated from high school yet.
As a straight ally for the LGBT community, I know a few individuals who have struggled with coming out. It’s incredibly difficult to see how fear and lack of support can sometimes dictate how people feel their lives must be lived.
Not only is Oct. 11 National Coming Out Day, but the month of October is LGBT History Month as well. For more than 40 years, the LGBT movement has been fighting for equality and understanding. They’ve been changing policies and opening minds through unification, according to the Human Rights Campaign.
Over the last few years, our generation has been a part of some incredible portions of LGBT history. From the repeal of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” and the passage of hate crimes law at the federal level, to President Barack Obama’s support for marriage equality, powerful history is being made for the LGBT community in our lifetimes.
Though positive movement is happening for equality among LGBT individuals, there is still work to be done. October is a month to understand and raise awareness for the LGBT community.
When I saw Courtney after she had come out, I knew she was exactly where she was supposed to be in her life. I had never seen my cousin happier or more confident. Everyone should have this opportunity.
Through unification and action we can end oppression and discrimination of gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered individuals, ultimately promoting a positive, aware and accepting culture.
Being a small part of Courtney’s journey is something that I will always appreciate. Standing with those on campus and in our community that are LGBT and straight allies is key in ridding society of homophobia and heterosexism.
I want to one day be able to stand up for myself with courage the way Courtney has. For now, the least I can do is stand with the LGBT community in support.