Raving with zombies is lame
Digital copycat of the 1968 cult classic “The Night of the Living Dead,” “House of the Dead” is a new version without the farmhouses.
“House of the Dead” starts when Simon Cruz (Tyron Leitso) tells his friends Cynthia (Sonya Salomma), Greg (Will Sanderson), and Karma (Enuka Okuma), about a rump-shaking rave on a remote island near Seattle.
The sexy college students decide to go and get their groove on and bring their lovesick friend Alicia (Ona Grauer).
Alicia has broken up with her boyfriend and does not really want to go.
After her friends practically beg her, she changes her mind.
Messing around with Alicia, the hot-to-trot students miss the boat that is supposed to take them to the island.
Desperate to party, Simon asked Capt.Victor Kirk (Jurgen Prochnow) to charter his boat, the Lazarus, to the rave.
For whatever reason, the coast guard starts to chase the Lazarus; Victor eludes the capture and manages to get the Lazarus to shore.
When the students get to the shore, they find island deserted.
There are several obvious warning signs given to the students to not go to the rave, but they decide to search the island for the missing ravers anyway.
Minutes into the search, the students are attacked by zombies and monsters.
These Einsteins find shelter in an old house where Alicia’s ex-boyfriend Rudy (Jonathan Cherry) and his friends Hugh (Michael Eklund) are hiding from the zombies.
Rudy and Michael tell the students that the zombies and the monsters ravaged everyone at the party and they are the only survivors. Better yet, they have it all on tape.
The crews of students decide that the rave is not the party they had bargained for and decide that they now want to go back to the Lazarus.
“House of the Dead” is definitely not an adult or children’s flick.
Viewers watching this film will find themselves easily aggravated with the dim witted characters.
Seriously, how many warning signs do these people need?
First, they missed the party boat; second, they are being taken to a remote island by a boat called the Lazarus.
Third, you don’t go walking around on a deserted island that looks spooky.
Unless you want some serious hurt when you get caught, you never run away from the coast guards.
“Never Leave You Ooh Oh! Ooh Oh!” by Lumidee would have been the perfect theme song for this movie.
In both “House of the Dead” and “Night of the Living Dead,” the zombies have a serious case of the munchies and they prefer their humans raw.
The bottom line is to kill zombies in the most creative way possible.
It’s the old good vs. evil, fight to live another day, battle-to-death Halloween film.
The difference is that in the 1968 thriller, the people are smarter and the movie is less predictable.
Save your $10 and rent the original “Night of the Living Dead” directed by George Romero.
(“House of the Dead” is rated R. It recieves two out of five stars)