Imagine there is a show where a guy who looks like a Tim Burton directed Dr. Seuss character teaches open minded, mostly lost and confused men how to pick up women.

Well the heavens have answered their prayers in the form of VH1’s reality show, “The Pick-Up Artist” starring master pick-up artist Mystery as he teaches insecure men how to seduce the ladies.

The cream of the crop as far as contestants go seems to have been picked here, with a cast of characters that include a 27-year-old virgin, a guy who stutters around women so he spells words out (wait, that is the same guy) and a guy whose last kiss was to his mom on the forehead (wait, still the same guy).

Mystery, founder of the Mystery method, helps these men with his trusted “wings,” Matador and Tara, to master the art of picking up women.

Out of these men, one will become the true “pick-up artist.”

The first episode provided some great laughs as the hopeful males were asked to try and talk to women in a bar. thatIt did not go so well for them.

So Mystery and Matador, being master pick-up artists, decided to show the contestants how it is done by walking into the bar with no “props” (by props I mean hats, watches, and things of that sort) and getting girls to respond to them.

Now VH1 only showed Mystery being able to pick up on all these women but never showed one turn him down, even though more than likely a guy who looks like a hybrid of Willy Wonka and Slash from Guns & Roses would not receive as much attention from a woman as the show indicates.

Mystery has also been prominently portrayed in Neil Strauss’s book “The Game” where he provided a biographical account of his time with Mystery developing his Mystery Method and teaching it all over the place.

The one gripe with Mystery and the “The Pick-Up Artist” in general is that while entertaining, the show should be called “Basic Speech Communication taught by a guy with a pseudonym.”

Sure, Mystery throws out all this cool pick-up jargon like AFC (Average Frustrated Chump) or Roll Off ( showing disinterest by moving body) or Indicators of Interest Non Verbal’s (in the speech world are non-verbal communicators).

However, his main point is to have confidence; any guy should be able to pick-up on that.

Picking up on women is great sometimes, but what does that say about you to be a “professional pick-up artist” or as the winner in season 1 said, he is not a player or a pimp, he is a pick-up artist, as if it sounded any better.

Guys need to realize that they don’t need a former magician named Mystery to help solve their romantic quandaries.

Even Mystery kicked off a guy on the first episode this season because Mystery believed he couldn’t help him (what is the show there for if not to help people)?

Does this indicate that there are hopeless men in the world who will never be successful at picking up women or have a good relationship?

There is no mystery to the pick-up, just common knowledge: be yourself and be confident.